“I was 39 years old and going through what some would call a ‘mid-life crisis’.
Separated from my husband of 15 years, engaged again, a single mom and an artist struggling to figure out finances and find myself… I turned HARD to the bottle to help me escape the realities of life.
I was a workaholic. An over achiever. Someone who never said “no” and took on way more than I could possibly handle. I liked to “fix” people without realizing I needed fixing too. I moved through life like a force, never letting anything stop me.
Until I got a DUI and almost had my daughter taken away from me.
Well that was that. I had hit my version of rock bottom and due to several family, friends and police interventions, wound up finding Trafalgar Residence. Despite my family wanting me to be closer to them, I went to visit Trafalgar and knew the second I drove down the driveway that this was the place for me.
I had researched several rehabilitation facilities, but the cold, concrete jungle and big city views I was seeing online made me cringe. I wanted to go to a place I could TRULY rehabilitate. I wanted trees. Fresh air. Quiet. Greenery. Peacefulness. Healthy food choices and exercise. And that’s what Trafalgar offered.
Even though I knew everyone around me was concerned, this was going to be on MY terms. I was going to re-gain control of MY life. I registered and paid for the cost of the rehab all by myself… And it is not cheap. But? A better investment than the thousands I was pouring into the LCBO and it was proof of my commitment to MYSELF to get better. I stayed at Trafalgar for the 30-day program and quite frankly (apart from the being away from my daughter and fiancé) could have moved in.
My therapist, Jody, was the perfect match for me. We really connected on a human level, and she made me understand that my addiction wasn’t like some people’s… I didn’t experience trauma and then addiction, my addiction created trauma. She met with my daughter and I in a family session and helped her feel comfortable with mommy’s new journey.
It was a beautiful setting, actually. The three of us sat out in the gazebo, and my daughter was free to get up and walk around or play with a ball when she felt uncomfortable. She opened up to Jody without being forced to say anything at all and wound up leaving me with some very impactful things my heart will always remember.
The staff all treated me with respect and they really do look at you on a case-by-case situation when it comes to the liberties you have there. Granted, there are blanket rules put in place for a reason, but I guarantee you… Whatever effort and energy you put in – you will get out.
I never pictured my life sober… I always thought I’d just cool it for a while and then go back to drinking socially, but I know more about my capabilities now.
I had a few months of follow up conversations with Frank which were nice. We chatted life and any triggers or struggles I may have been encountering. I had a lot going on between custody and financial battles with my ex, CAS involvement, moving/selling my house, starting school, back pain… He made sure I stayed on the right track.
I’m 7 months sober, back in school and working on a new career to provide for myself and my daughter. I definitely have hard days, but ultimately, have been given the tools to stay strong through it all.
I wish everyone had the opportunity to take 30 days out of life to focus on themselves and re-evaluate their life priorities. I don’t look at my time at Trafalgar as being in ‘rehab’… I look at it as a ‘self-discovery retreat’. I have found my love for myself and passion for life again without a vice. (Well… Coffee. Maybe coffee is my new vice!)”
